Depravity

Depravity. It isn't a topic many like to linger on. And yet, it's vitally important to understanding so much. This world. Our own heart. The pain we witness, the things we do. Mark 7:21-23 - “For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, …

Valid questions

"Do you think you've minimized this?""Do you think you're naive?" They were valid questions. How can I be so sure of staying in my marriage? How can I feel so confident when I tell people, "My marriage is new!" Don't I look foolish? Am I a fool? And yet, the answer to these questions rose …

Who am I, really?

Who am I, really? This seems to often be the question. Whether we are searching for our self worth in all the wrong places, or we're basing our identity on our jobs, our marriage, our past, our success, our failures. I have seen a trend amongst the infidelity crowds. Or, maybe more accurately, I see …

Reaffirming Love

We met with our Pastor for counseling last night. He is wanting to walk with us through our 13 week program, and beyond. He, and everyone who knows within our family of faith, have handled this trial extraordinarily well. I can't tell you how many stories I've read of women suffering at the hands of …

An almost bad day

I almost had a bad day.I could begin to feel myself slipping. My mind. My emotions. My safety nets. My prayer life. I was feeling tired, and numb, and like a free fall was inevitable. It was Tuesday night, our small group sat together and I waited for my turn to speak privately to the …

Valentine’s Day

I've wanted so bad for the Lord to redeem this week. This holiday. This month. A month that swims in red hearts, and roses, and perfect ideas about love. And so, I prayed. And, I prayed. I asked for God to make it new, and somehow, better. Redeemed. Restored. Today, my husband handed me a …

Death Day anniversary

Exactly a year ago.My husband was unfaithful.Exactly a year ago, tomorrow. My world exploded as he confessed his sin. D-day.We went to bed last night with an awareness of what was to come. Last night was the night he met her, his final act of adultery. His sin rose up in him, enticing him, offering …

Free flowing confession

We've continued with our weekly phone calls, walking through this difficult process with others. We shared a snapshot of our story last night. There was a lot of sadness as we sat and listened to others share. We understood certain struggles they faced, others added complexities that we could only begin to understand. I'm sure …

A lament

I had to sit in the floor of the shower. The hot water rolling over my head, onto my back.My tears, matching the water's pace. All of it, flowing down the drain.Sobbing. Loudly. Wailing. Lamenting. I'm sure my kids could hear.And, my husband, too. There was no use trying to muffle the sound of my …

A catalyst for deeper repentance

We had our first group call for the 13 week program we've enrolled ourselves in. It went well. It was scary, but it was easy to see that it was a safe place and one where vulnerability and honesty was embraced. I trust it will be a good, hard thing. A fruitful part of our …